Is this really happening?

suddenly you know

I admit I’m full of ideas and a lot of talk, but seldom follow through with any of my hair-brained schemes.  But what I am about to do is REAL.  The next chapter of Shari Nova’s life is about to begin.

Like many women my age, I grew up in a good family, went to school, got married, had a family and dreamed of all the cool things I would get to do as I cruised through life. One of the dreams I had was to retire at the usual age, jump into an RV with my spouse and a dog or cat and travel around the country.  Much to my surprise (naiveté?), things don’t always turn out like you think they should.  Or do they?

As an example, a few years before I could retire, my then-husband announced he had decided to move to Haiti to build a school for an impoverished community — and I wasn’t invited.  I honored his noble efforts and was grateful for the love and support he had given me over the years, but was surprised and heartbroken to find out he wasn’t on board with my “Airstream Dream” retirement plan.

This wasn’t this first time my heart was broken, so I knew I needed to get help.  Thanks to the Grief Recovery Program, good friends, a loving family and some life-coaching, I snapped out of the divorce doldrums and started planning my life anew. From the Grief Recovery Program I learned about taking responsibility for my own actions and reactions.  I realized that I didn’t need to start over, I just needed to pick up the pieces of my broken dreams and breathe new life into them.

Following are some of the ways I started devising my plan, you are welcome to borrow any that you haven’t already thought of:

  1. Needs vs Wants: Part of making a change is taking stock of what you have, what you need and what you can let go of.  When I realized I was working hard to maintain a lifestyle that no longer served me, I knew it was time to stop spending time and money to maintain the status quo.
  2. Beyond the journal: Not that I wrote every day, but often enough that I could ponder my future without spending anything but time.  As you will see in some of my other posts, I went beyond the journal to sketching, taking pictures, researching the internet and creating a fantasy that somehow has come true.
  3. Downsize: If you haven’t reached this point in your life yet, I’ll let you in on a little secret – downsizing sets you free!  Thanks to Craig’s List, the local Facebook groups and thrift stores I slowly (it took over a year!) sold or gave away items that I no longer needed.  Rather than feeling depleted, I felt fulfilled and happy as I passed along heirloom furniture, nearly-new kitchenware, clothing and other items to people who really needed them.
  4. Embrace the change:  Fear is a frequent flyer in the cockpit of change.  Dig deep and find out what you fear most, then challenge it head on.  Are you concerned about finances (who isn’t?) your health or the environment?  Do some research, talk to your friends and find out how valid your fears might be.  Really – what’s the worst that can happen?
  5. Trust your instincts – Trust is a large part of making any big decision.  You have to trust that you are making a change that will benefit you (I’m talking about self-care, not about selfishness).  Through your intuition, instincts, wisdom and curiosity, you can create your reality.  Don’t worry about the “hows” just yet, just figure out what you want to do.

A few months ago a woman came into my office.  It isn’t unusual to see new folks in my property management office, but this woman was different.  She was dressed in white from the top of her salt-and-pepper hair to her toes.  Somehow our meeting veered off the can-you- rent-my-house-for-me track to a deep spiritual conversation.  One of the messages I got from her that day was that she believed – and I agree – that our life was pretty much written before we were born.  Certain life lessons are charted in our life book and at the appropriate time the page is turned to reveal the next part of our story.

Although I am a little timid about starting my new adventure – turning the page – and sharing it with you, I know my story is written and all I have to do is show up with gratitude and grace.  I invite you, dear reader, to join me.  As the moderator of the story I confess that I don’t always know the answers or have the best insight, but I TRUST it will be a fun journey.  Thank you for reading my blog!  Sign up and let’s see what the world has to offer us!

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2 Comments on “Is this really happening?

  1. New chapters are always part of the story. I love true stories and I look forward to reading yours.


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